Here There Be Dragons

Is it so much to ask for just ONE totally awesome dragon movie? Seriously, its one of the reasons I really wanted Peter Jackson to tackle the Hobbit, because there would be an awesome dragon in it. I would like to take a moment to review...

Dragonheart: Not bad, especially as Dragon Movies go, but somehow managed to make a dragon movie into an ABC family special... Sean Connery voiced the dragon, and it was all about love or something like that. Blah blah blah... Last of the Dragons, etc.

Dungeons & Dragons: Hey! I know, I'm looking for a great new lead for a totally awesome fantasy flick... who should I pick... YEAH THAT'S IT!!! A Wayan's Brother would be Perfect for one of them! Someone please put a flaming enchanted serpentine kris right between my +4 Charisma eyes.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon: They're not joking about "Hidden Dragon." I couldn't find one ANYWHERE.

Reign of Fire: Dragons and Christian Bale, doesn't seem like it could go wrong. The Visuals were AWESOME. The Movie was crappy. I cried... many nights.

The NeverEnding Story: Possibly one of the best to date. I mean come'on, I named my first cat Falcore when I was little.


Which brings us all the way around to the other night. When Ro, Kris, Scott, Trueblood, Hauge and I all saw Eragon. We were incredibly excited, for anyone who doesn't know, just ask Ro why. Turns out, this movie was no better than the rest. The Book is Amazing. Read it. Buy it and the rest of them. After leaving the theatre my synopsis went something like this:

I feel like they took the book and instead of making the movie off of that, they made it off the cliffnotes version. But the director didn't really READ the cliffnotes, just skimmed the back and inside cover then tried to explain the story to his Hyperactive ADD 6 year old daughter. Whom he then recorded telling the story to her dolls, played it back to himself in fastforward and went from there.

"First there was this boy who found a dragon, but it was a little bitty really really really really really really cute baby dragon who didn't know how to fly so the boy taught it to fly and then it was really big and the boy could ride it although he wasn't very good but it was ok cause the old guy taught him how to fight even though he already knew how and started a fire with magic and the boy shot the monster with a magic arrow and rode the dragon and saved the good guys from the army... but I don't remember where the army came from... but it doesn't matter and he saved the world!"

I'm in love...

So, new short Best Buy post for everyone here.

I was up at customer service helping a customer who had ordered a laptop from another store when a coworker came up to the register next to me... I notice then that the customer he was helping was a typical college co-ed blonde type with a tight baby tee, tight jeans and a black thong (trust me, it was noticeable). Knowing the coworker, I assumed he was excited about having a customer like this and I'm sure we'd bring it up later.

A minute or so later, I was done helping my customer and was able to actually look up. She wasn't really really hot... but just in that sorta skanky way. And then I noticed that her Baseball cap was pulled down over her eyes was black and said "Vu." And then I noticed a bright green lanyard that said Deja Vu.

It wasn't that she was attractive. Or even had an amazing body or anything like that... it was just the fact that I knew if I went down the street I "could" see her naked. The very VERY best part of all?

She paid $400 in all small bills.

Pic here.

So I owe you a post...

How about this for a Rob post:
I hate customers.
How's that?

No seriously. People, it's the holidays. Every where you go is going to be crazy. Be nice to the people who don't get paid enough at retail stores. Here's a guy that I don't know who made a post that I would love to have made myself. Its about standing up for retail people/waiters when they've got unreasonable customers being bastards. The guy in his post talks about how the phrase "The customer is always right" has lead to the downfall of civility in America... and I agree. I had a guy patronize me at work today and I silently wished him to die in a fire.

What? Don't tell me that's too harsh. There's a special place in hell for people who are unnecessarily rude to employees. I was just hoping to give him a bit of a warm up for the rest of his eternity. Basically he complained to a manager because I didn't readily know how to ring up his $3 off coupon for his Superman Returns movie. Lets get this straight, I was helping to check out people because I was being nice. And he was a tool.

My other awesome conversation went like this on a phone.

Me: Best Buy Computers, this is Rob, how may I help you?
Her: Yeah, I bought a computer/printer package yesterday...
Me: Ok.
Her: Yeah and I didn't get my remote control.
Me: Remote control for what ma'am?
Her: My printer.
Me: There's no remote control for that printer...
Her: THEN WHY is there a picture of one here.
Me: Ma'am, none of our printers come with remote controls.
Her: If there's "NO remote" control, WHAT exactly am I looking at?
Me: . . .
Her: . . .
Me: . . .
Her: HELLO?!?!?
Me: Wait, are you serious? Ma'am I don't have the slightest idea what you're looking at right now...
Her: Fine. You know what? Let me talk to that Geek Squad.
Me: Sure thing. [Transfers the crazy lady to be someone else's problem]

Maybe she's just new to this whole telephone thing. Maybe she thought I was like Miss Cleo. Maybe she's freshly ridden the White Pony.... I don't know.



But this made my day. Ro and I came back from the store to find this jackass parked like... (You know this one Scott...) like an idiot. So we let the world know how we felt.

Its Christmas Time!!!

We put up the tree!!
Which pretty much means
I took it out of my closet
and out of the bag...

Political Science

Randy Newman was just one The Colbert Report (7 min segment here). I looked into it just a minute and found out the song I thought he may have written just for The Colbert Report was actually quite old... So without further ado, Randy Newman circa 1972.

There are actually rules???

So I stumbled across this on Digg and thought... "seriously?"

www.shotgunguide.com gives you a compiled list of rules for calling shotgun when going to a car. I would like to draw attention to the details that are laid out for the rules of shotgun. Ro will be glad to see there is even a Special Needs clause:

This inspired me to look up a few other car rules such as Padiddle, and Kiss the Ceiling. I was never a big one for Padiddle, but Kristy Cunningham and Liz Brown taught me Kiss the Ceiling when I was a Sophomore in High School... Rewards I've always heard for kissing the ceiling was "10 minutes good luck," "10 minutes better sex," and "a good luck avoiding a ticket." Oh, and I almost forgot about Punch Buggy (aka Slug Bug).

Finally for your time wasting pleasure...
Swords and Sandals: Gladiator Game!