Don't know if anyone remembers, but before the end of the new year I hijacked an office buliten board and used it for my own purposes (link here). And in that post I had asked the question, I wonder how long before they take that away from me. Well folks, I forgot to give you the answer to that question: After a month of being blank, the next day I was back the "Powers That Be" informed me that they decided they wanted to use it after all (I say the next day I was back because I had an injury day and a vacation day off). So I was asked to make the gridwork for a calender on the dry erase board, in permant marker. You better believe this job took me well over an hour. So now, Its a boring calender, with only 3 things written on it - noting peoples vacation days. Aparently my board was too distracting and too much fun for the office environment. There were actual instances of tour groups arriving at the front door, busloads of senior citizens who honestly mistook this place for Disney World. So I can see why the board had to of been taken care of immediately. And I hope that now you can all see, why I quit. The 28th is my last day at American Water Resources.
Hey speaking of conspiricy theories, I've got one of my own. What the hell ever happened to the Tan M&M's? I don't mean brown, I mean TAN! I know they used to exist. I'm not in "The Forgotten" or anything. I'll tell you what happened. BLUE HAPPENED! They had that big "Vote for the new M&M color" thing and Blue won. The next day, no more tan. I believe there was an unaired commercial featuring New Mr. Blue "accidently" knocking Mr. Tan over a railing and into a giant vat of molten chocolate. Sure the company's Offical Statement is that Mr. Tan was "exploring other business opportunities." Sure, if by that you mean, BEING MELTED DOWN ALIVE AND WITHOUT A TRACE SO MR. BLUE COULD GRAB A BETTER FOOTING IN THE MARKET!!!!!
whew... ok, sorry. Been holding that in too long. On an up side there's apparently a genius kid. He reminds me of me at a young age. Of course by young age I mean like 19, and he's only 8. Anyways, article about him here and here's the 8 year old's frickin' website (which gets more hits than mine.... jerk.) Geeze, so much for an up side. Everything in this post sucks. I quit.
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9 comments:
I don't care how old he is, that web page sucks ass. No coherent design scheme, unappealing colors, and the thing is riddled with grammatical errors.
Example: "I HAVE LEARNT THE HIGH LESSON OF COMPUTER NOT DUE TO ANY FEAR OF STICK..." Okay, not even mentioning that the kid is yelling at me, capital-style, but that sentence took me at least three tries before I realized "fear of stick" meant getting beaten and not possessing an innate fear of joysticks. There was another alternate meaning, but it was mostly sexual and hopefully wouldn't make sense to the 8-year-old.
And I don't think "learnt" is a freaking word. Congratulations kid, you know Frontpage. Now learn to proofread.
Ah, I'm sorry, MicrosoftKid. I don't mean to be so mean. Maybe I'm just jealous because you're well on your way to becoming a computer genius and the most I can do is edit the HTML in my blog so it's widescreen. (I'm still freaking proud of that, though.) But mostly, I remember what it was like to be advanced for your age. Welcome to a life of wedgies, awkwardness, and crippling ostracism. Start taking guitar lessons or something, because you're going to need all the cool points you can get.
Wow. Speaking of Repressed feelings...
Not trying to take away from the glaring jealousy that's showing its spiteful head here. Hey Tim, in all your pre-pubescent genuiosity did you ever meet the president of your country, or another country or Bill Gates? No? Even with your dad a State Representative? Hmmmmm...
It's hard for me to imagine my day without Rob. If only he would stop reminding me that he is leaving. For nearly three (off-and-on) years, Rob has gone from being that ignorant brat who refused to listen to me and for a short-period had what one would only desribe as, mustard-colored, hair...to an ignorant brat with is natural hair color, but purple and mustard-colored bruised legs. OK, so he hasn't changed much...but at least he makes it interesting here. Sure, another chorus of him and Freemama singing Jingle Bells, and I would have personally choked him, but he does bring a certain je ne sais quoi...or something like that.
Moving on to the chocolate discussion. In 1941 there was a violet colored M&M added to the batch, but the infamous TAN replaced that one in 1949. So before you feel too bad for Tan, think about poor Violet. I'd personally like to know why Orange was removed from the Peanut ones and replaced with Blue! Blue obviously has ties to the mob and put pressure on the Mars company to be added to all bags, because he is a power hungry lunatic! I think he may have murdered Tan...think about it.
I've gotta go find something productive to do.
Remember: the more Blue ones you eat, the less of them there are...
~Captain Caveman
Your mom met the president of another country.
Agreed. We must destroy him. His power is far too great, and I won't have someone trying to usurp me for sheer genious. What is the deal with this kid? His coloring books aren't good enough for him?
I do take solice in the fact that before he can become a successful US Computer Technician, he has to be a cab driver. I suggest we all don't tip him. That will show the little snot! And Tim, you were at least smart enough to stay quiet as a genious kid, I was the one who would finish his work in 2 1/2 minutes and then make fun of bullies.
In fact, I still more or less do that. (And by work I mean school work/job work. Any work I do in the horizontal position gets the full 6 hour treatment. Just felt I needed to head off that joke.) Anyway I distinctly remember a certain Justin Carpunky taking a wooden chair, smashing it and chasing me with a leg because of something I said to him in PE. So yeah, that was fun.
Come to think of it, where the hell are the Indian bullies on this kid? Isn't someone supposed to be oppressing him for his brillance? Or has he hooked them all up with the good Indian Porn? ("Wow, this is berry berry hot" "Yes, my friend! You can see her ankles and chin and EVERYTHING!")
Ah, ackward childhoods. Fun fun.
Btw, it IS a conspiricy about the Tan M&M. He went to work for Bush's Baked beans. Apparently he sits in the mix undercover and waits for that dog to try to sell the family secret. Major sting operation.
I think I've said too much, they're on to me.
- Scott
Congrats on leaving your job...hopefully you have another lined up!
I hate M&M's...so I have no idea that there was ever a tan or violet! Not that I just hate M&Ms...I don't care for chocolate, unless it's got something inside like caramel or peanut butter....not nuts, just caramel or peanut butter! Nutrageous is awesome! Sorry you feel so threatened by this evil blue color that allegedly killed tan...maybe it was just that the Mars company was too right or left wing for him and he had to go and join some other candy company because he was not insink with where Mars Company was headed...
Personally, I think that website sucks too...it's not very flowing, or eye friendly. He's only 8 though, so maybe by the time he's in Jr. High (or before) he'll discover girls and loose interest in computers. Who knows.
Tabitha
Captain: I didn't realize we had such a Connoisseur of Chocolates in our midst. Sounds like you did your senior thesis on the shady infrastructure of the M&M (Mars) Company. Impressive.
Tim: Hey, don't take it out on me or my mom. Why don't you have a little pow-wow with our little desi friend? Better yet, make a webpage about it (using your own advice to make it better). Even better, make it in Hindi, I mean he knows your language at the age of 8. By the way... YOUR mom went to college.
Scot: Thanks for going "there." You can always be counted on to bringing it to the next level. Also, you're a "Smart"-ass. Don't try and fool anyone into believing it goes any further than that.
Tabby: Wouldn't it be great if I had something else in mind? Yeah, that'd be nice.
PJ: Thank you for giving me what could be a plausible explanation for Mr. Tan. I like thinking of him as the silent overlord. I bet he's hooked up with Ms. Green too... [growl]
I had NO IDEA that there was a tan M&M... and I lOVE M&Ms. I guess the tan M&M was before my time...
I can't stand child prodigies... I'm gonna find him and end him. He's making everyone else look bad. At least his website is not that great. I almost laughed when I saw it, I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought so (Not that I could ever make a website... I can barely use a computer, but that's beyond the point. His website sucks).
~Ro
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