Secondly Melinda and I were talking about new matchups (Freddy vs. Jason and the like) that might include Christmas icons. And I wondered to myself... If Rudolph could focus his nose energys, could he produce a beam of death from that nose of his. I mean, bright enough to guide santa's sleigh is a bit of energy - Rudolph may be a force to not mess with.
Thirdly, today we donated money towards "Community Christmas" here at work. The deal is, if you donate $10 you can wear blue jeans for that month. A lot of people are like, "I don't care enough about wearing blue jeans to spend $10" but that's hardly the point here. Its funny how some people can just become callused to anything work-related. Its about a kid getting a christmas present. Also I'd like to mention that I'm not speaking about one particular person at work, its more of a generalization that I believe a chunk of people probably fall into at American Water. Its not a specific person within the trailer... Not Rene or anything. Not that she takes toys OUT of the Toys for Tots bin and then gives them to her nieces and nephews or anything...
And since I haven't given you anything good from our mail lately, here's something from today:
"The Cat in the Hat on Aging"
I cannot see
I cannot pee
I cannot chew
I cannot screw
Oh, my God, what can I do?
My memory shrinks
My hearing stinks
No sense of smell
I look like hell
My mood is bad -- can you tell?
My body's drooping
Have trouble pooping
The Golden Years have come at last
The Golden Years can kiss my ass
And for the quote of the day, this one by Trevor since he did win the trivia yesterday:
"Are you a god?"
"No"
"Then die!"
"When someone asks you if you're a god, you say YES!"
8 comments:
Melinda,
I am so sorry that you don't know the words to Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer. But I am even more sorry that Rob is making you sing it with him while you guys work... good luck putting up with him for the rest of the holiday season.
Rob,
We were talking about aging in my Developmental Psych class. The Cat in the Hat on Aging is hilarious. But I think I need to clear up some misconceptions for the person who wrote the ditty and for those of you who are reading it. I want to take a look at the line that says "I cannot screw." According to my textbook, "Although both sexes experience losses in reproductive capacity. . . sexual enjoyment can continue throughout adult life." So, yes, older adults can still have the capacity to derive pleasure from sexual encounters or "screwing". Just thought everyone would like to know.
~Ro
ooooh I think i know this quote!!!! It's from Ghostbuster (the first one) when they are up on top of the apartment building with the freakish lesbian looking woman dressed in glitter. She asks (I believe Dan Ackroyd) one of the Ghostbuster's if he is a god and he says now so she shoots out some lazor beam at him. So the Bill Murray says "If anyone asks if you are a god always say yes!"
Ro,
Thanks for clearing up that misconception about aging and sex! It's very reassuring to know that when I'm 80 some years old I can still enjoy screwing. Whew!
~Breyn
I'd like to see Rudolph blow a hole through Frosty with a beam of light from his nose, I think that would be interesting.
(Not that I hate Frosty or anything, he's a cool guy! No pun intended)
~Breyn
Does anyone remember the pre-South-Park-hits-uberpopularity Jesus vs. Santa Claus animation? This would be back in what some refer to as "the day" (before I had my driver's license even! sheesh!), but Rob's comment about holiday death matches reminded me. A Christmas classic!
Rob, you should have blogged on the death matches in earlier, like around Halloween, so we could have some fun. I think our tag team (in the famous movie character category) between Wolverine, Edward Scissorhands, and Shredder could have really drawn a crowd. As it is, I feel a little debilitated by the Christmas theme. My matchup between two (evil) holiday characters would have to be
EBENEEZER SCROOGE VS. THE MAGICIAN IN FROSTY THE SNOWMAN
*Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!*
If you'll let us by with only one holiday character, the matches get a little more interesting:
SANTA'S ELVES VS. THE KEEBLER ELVES
(although we all know Legolas could stomp both groups easily)
SANTA CLAUS VS. THE MARTIANS
(an old MST3K flick if anyone's interested...)
I leave you all to ponder bigger and better things.
Happy week before finals!
Lisa
You guys didn't hear? Rudolph went Hindi, now he has a dot on his forehead that glows. Much like Gwen Stefani before she lost all her talent. Except for looking beyond hot, that's quite a talent; I don't care what dimension you're from. Come to think of it, she really could be like the pretty cousin of that dyke in the body suit (Gozer?) I was never clear if that was Gozer, or Gozer was the Marshmellow Man.
Although I'm like 90% sure that the Staypuff Marshmellow Man was just his harbringer of doom. Ghostbusters, ah what a great movie. To this day (since like the 80's) I've had this Ghostbuster comforter. Right now it's on my bed. I'll take a pic sometime. It's the best bed cover ever.
As far as Christmas match-ups, the Tiny Tim vs. The Island of Misfit Toys. He may be sickly, but he has that crutch. And the toys, though misfits, can use some teamwork. I'd like to see it. - Scott
You got the right movie, but you are wrong on the technicality of you named the wrong individual as the speaker of the last line. I'll leave it to someone else to name the right guy.
In regards to the halloween showdown, I'd love to add Jack Skellington to the previously mentioned matchup. He rocks ass. And he could pull double duty, and whoop up on rudolph, frosty, and the other christmas folks. He has Zero to help him out, and if you happen to blow off a body part, well, he can reattach it...after he beats you senseless with it.
Trevor
Very good Trevor, I didn't even notice. Just assumed the contest was long won. In that case, (having just watched it not long ago) I think it was Winston (the black guy who didn't do any other films except Ghostbusters 2) who said that line. That movie is comic gold, it's GOLD Jerry GOLD! - Scott
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